I Have A Dream

I think I have started this post quite a few ways in the last five minutes. In between I had to eat some cookie dough...

I have pictures to post and lots of stuff in my head, better get it all out before I am dead.

Now that we have a sampling of my bad poetry, I can continue. There is no theme for this one, or common story so it might be a bit disjointed.

Here are the inhabitants of my asylum. And when I say asylum, I mean loving home...

I like to joke about their craziness and all of that, but what has been so nice is realizing how much I love the little world we share together. I'm not one for unwarranted sap for the sake of being sappy. In this picture they all could use a good hair brushing (and I know you can't smell but the teeth needed it too) but these are some pretty fun kids:)

I was just talking with a friend this morning about the not so little diva that becomes the focal point of this picture. No one tells her what to do, but I really love it. Because in today's world, you have to be strong. I listen to conference talks while I work out at the gym. Lately, I have been listening to the 1971 broadcast. I'm amazed at how back then the warnings of the corruption in the world were so heavily a part of the talks. We always think of how immoral people are today in the world, but really things haven't changed...it's just a different type of ick. Sometimes it is a worse version, but we all still face the same problems. Good decisions are hard to make each day now, just as they always have been. Every day we get up and try to work a little harder. My every day is getting up to work a little harder for them.

Little things are the best. Like when you not only get a cleaner garage, but your kids get to play with sparklers for a reason other than 4th of July. The house in the background belongs to our neighbors, who have been one of the most unexpected blessings for me. You think you move somewhere for one reason, and it ends up being something completely different. I think it is those little things that help me know my Heavenly Father loves me. I've been in a mode for so long of what's next, what is the next goal to finish or thing to check off? I am realizing, even if it is slowly, that there are times for that and times to enjoy what you have worked so hard for. 

 

Before anyone wonders why I took a picture of my biscuits and gravy, let me clarify it was not for the blog but for a personal text message. Although I realized today it should be on here. Why? Because I can whip up biscuits and gravy just because and with no recipe. How cool is that? I think it is because when you get to a point with anything where you can do it based on pure knowledge, it's pretty amazing. Even if it is just some bread and sauce.

 Last night, my oh so wise husband mentioned the phrase "living the dream." (of which the credit also goes to our old Bishop) I can hear him chuckle now as I bring this up today...

We are living our dream, but sometimes it is hard to understand that. Shouldn't the dream feel differently? A dream is a wish your heart makes....la, la, la, la, la...as we dance around with the prince in a beautiful ball gown. I really am living my dream, even if my ball gown consists of yoga pants and my husband's hoodie. I have a ton to be grateful for, and not just when it comes time to eat turkey. 

I'm almost at the end of a section of time in which I have young kids at home all day. I'll have no one to entertain at the car wash or bring snacks for so they don't cry--

I am curious as to how that will feel. I like to make assumptions of freedom and liberty, but I think there will be lots of other feelings as well. I wouldn't go so far as to say I mastered this stage of my life or scored 100% on the test. But I am not one of those to  tell myself I did horribly either. The nice thing is that it isn't even close to being over. I think I  am just about to finish pre-algebra and haven't even seen the crazy yet. 

When life gives you lemons... EAT CANDY.

No, really, do it because candy makes everything better. This post cannot be misunderstood as life is giving me lemons and I am so sad. How boring would life be without lemons. They make diet coke particularly nicer as well. So most people don't pray for trials...mostly because they don't have to. Those little boogers pop up everywhere. I could take this time to give the analogy of how working out is the same thing. You love how strong your body becomes after you work so hard and almost want to puke, etc... But anyone who doesn't work out will probably want to puke on me for bringing that one up. I know I would have before I started working out. So before this starts to sound pretentious I will stop the comparison--Especially when I just gave counsel to eat candy.

Do you want to just start singing Cliiiiiimmmmmmbbbb every mountain....right about now? I really do. But since I am not much of a singer, I will stop. Instead, let's move on to climbing step stools instead. (I just realized I am talking to someone in this blog...hope that isn't odd and someone comes over with some medication)

The kids love to use this step stool to get to everything. I think I might need to buy more because it is the most used piece of equipment in our house. I can't remember the exact year we bought this stool, but it was pretty early in married life. It's moved around to the bazillion houses we have lived in and has still held up really well. It's been used for every purpose under the sun, including an afternoon snack table. At this point, we could go anywhere with the analogy, right?

I personally like to focus on its unexpected purpose in my life. I bought it to reach the top level of the kitchen cupboards and now it is such an important part of our day that the kids must know its whereabouts at all times. I have found that I have these little character traits that I had no idea would be so important later on. This makes me really think about my kids and what trait they might have individually that sets them apart that will be really necessary later in life. President Eyring gave a talk  a while back about looking for this in his own children and focusing on that aspect as he thought of how to help them shape their lives. 

Although most of the pictures I have lately are twin heavy, I really do try to think about each of BENKA individually. When people talk about how busy being a stay at home mom is, I think they assume physically running around and doing things. Although no doubt this can be true, I find at the end of the day my brain has been worked out more than anything. I would also say my emotions go hand in hand with my thoughts. The fun thing about parenting is that just because you get it down with one kid, doesn't mean you can do the same thing with all of them. So, all day long the brain works and works and toils and slaves over every day troubles and issues of creating and raising human beings (no pressure, right?) 

At this point, I'm not 100% sure why I decided to write all of this down. The blog is usually a little more light hearted. I'm also really anti throwing all my junk to the wind (I know that isn't a real phrase and totally doesn't make sense) At this point, the you I am talking to becomes my children. Mostly because I would really like them to understand what I think about. It is also just a little so they won't think I am totally insane. But the overwhelming reason I find is to say to them (and Ben too!) that I am for sure living the dream. I'm not just living it but I am loving it, as ordinary as it may incorrectly be labeled.